Here With You
by DuskFairie
Summary: Light lays awake thinking about his one fateful mistake, and is visited by someone that he thought was gone. It seems that no-one else can see or hear him, and L is different in some way. Inspired by Dusk Maiden of Amnesia. My first fanfiction :)
1. Chapter 1

Chapter One

* * *

Light's eyes slid open as he awoke from another nightmare; feeling empty inside.

The sounds from the street continued on dully in the city below, while he pulled the blankets closer to himself in the bed that he and L use to share while they had been chained together- when the detective had suspected him of being Kira. Light had thought at the time that he wasn't, was glad to find himself grasping at faint memories that had nothing to do with him being the killer, but after a while, he began to realize, that things were wrong...

There had been holes, gaps, circumstances that he couldn't quite fit in with everything else. He started to acknowledge the possibility that just maybe, he had been...

_Kira._

Light shivered and pulled the blankets in even tighter. They still had the pale detectives scent on them. If he closed his eyes, he could even just imagine him laying there beside him again. There was a pain in his chest that hadn't left him ever since it had happened, and tears stung at his eyes as he tried to block out those last moments when L had looked at him, and he had looked back- smiling, how could he have been smiling? And then, it had hit him. It was over, and the part of him that was Kira had taken joy in that triumph, before shying away and the side of him that was Light was left to process it...

No, it wasn't over. L was just...

_"Light-kun?"_

A voice, soft and faint called his name and his eyes flew open, looking around the room. There was nothing there. Had he just imagined it?

Light rolled over onto his back, and his eyes drifted back closed, but he couldn't sleep. He lay awake, listening, hoping that he would hear that voice again...

_"Light-kun,"_ This time he sat up, blinking away tears that threatened to fall down his cheeks. He had definitely just heard it that time, that voice though, it couldn't be...

"L?" He questioned quietly, feeling a lump build up in his throat and he swallowed it away quickly. The room was empty, and almost completely dark. His heart sank as he realized that there was no-one there.

He sat up, and walked away from the bed; stopping as he saw a flash of white at the corner of his vision, then turned to realize that what he had only seen were the clothes that the detective must have laid out on the arm chair, ready for him to change into the next day. Light wondered if he knew, when he had put them there, that he wouldn't be needing them...

He walked over and picked up the white shirt hesitantly. L had always worn the same thing everyday, and it was strange to see the clothes now without their owner... Light froze as he saw a glimpse of himself in the mirror across from him. A man that he no longer recognized stared back, with a maniacal grin. Kira.

Or was that... his smile? The reflections expression faltered as he stared at it, hating the person that he saw. Light Yagami; he was meant to be the perfect son, the perfect student, the perfect _person_, and L had seen through all that completely. He was the only one who had ever known him for who he truly was. Not Light, or Kira, but some blurred existence that was caught in-between, so similar to the detective himself. The world, and their circumstances had changed them both and had made them enemies.

No, Light thought. _I_ did that. The Death Note has the power to change peoples fate. It changed mine, and L's... if it hadn't been for it, if I hadn't used it...

_"You're getting warmer, Light-kun."_

Light dropped the shirt from his hands and turned around, feeling his heart thumping in his chest. "L?" He questioned again, then stopped as he looked back into the mirror.

Behind him, was L standing there smiling at him. His hands were in his pockets, and his raven black hair messy as it always was. The dark rims around his eyes seemed to be a little fainter, but otherwise... he looked exactly the same.

The teen stared into the glass, too afraid to take his eyes from it for a moment before he checked over his shoulder. No-one. He turned back around.

The mirror was again empty except for himself.

"L...?" His voice wavered as he took a step closer, arms outstretched towards the cold surface of the glass, flinching as the tips of his fingers touched it. "L... please come back," He pleaded, feeling his legs weaken from under him. He fell to the floor and hung his head, trying to hold back tears. He didn't want to be alone again, but more than that, he didn't want to be without-

_"Light-kun, I'm right here."_

Light slowly lifted his head up to see L standing behind him again; his reflection in the mirror put a hand down to his shoulder and Light could feel a corresponding weight touching him. He raised his own hand to hold it, but it fell through and landed onto his jacket.

"L... ?"

The detective smiled. _"Yes, Light-kun. I couldn't leave this world because of you,"_

Light took in a shaky breath as he stared at the reflection for a few moments, too scared to turn around again, and that L might disappear. "Because of me?" He questioned quietly.

_"That's right, or rather, because of this," _Light's heart quickened in his chest as the detective leaned over; his mind going blank as he felt soft lips against own, fingers tracing up his neck as a warm and dizzying sensation filled him. He stared at L through half hooded eyes, to make sure that he wouldn't vanish again, and he leaned into the kiss only to find himself falling forward...

He threw his arms in front of him and he stared at the floor, L had taken a step back, but he was sure that he had started falling before then...

"How... how is this possible...?"

The detective placed his hands back in his pockets, and thought for a moment. _"Just before my death, we shared a kiss..."_ Light looked up at him and nodded slowly._ "That kiss led me to have regret in my life, and now I'm bound to this world because of it..."_

The brunette stared at him, then pushed himself up from the floor. L was standing in front of him now, and if he hadn't known any different, it was just like he was a real person, but instead, he was... a ghost? A spirit?

"I can't touch you, can I?" Light questioned hesitantly, and L shook his head sadly. _"It doesn't seem that way,"_

They both stood there in silence as several minutes passed by.

"I'm sorry," Light eventually admitted, the words catching in his throat as L stared at him with an unreadable gaze. "I don't even deserve to say it, but, I... it was too late..."

A soft knock sounded on the bedroom door and both of them jumped slightly at hearing it. Light hesitated, then opened it- almost the same hue of hazel eyes staring back at him; Soichiro was glancing in at him worriedly. "Light? I didn't think that you would be asleep... I just wanted to check on you, make sure that you hadn't..." He left it hanging and cleared his throat. "Well, after that talk, I was worried that you might start thinking about certain things..."

Light opened the door and allowed his father to come in, remaining silent as he looked from him to L cautiously.

Am I the only one who can see him? He thought, as Soichiro took a seat on the end of the bed; the brightness from the hallway creeping it's way into the room. "After you told me about how you feel for L, I was a little shocked, and, maybe... I didn't really know how to handle it. I'm sorry, that I wasn't more understanding then..." Light felt himself blush as L walked up to his father curiously, examining his face as he spoke. He glanced up at the teen questioningly._ "How you feel for me?" _The detective repeated; a small smile tugging at his lips.

Light swallowed another lump in his throat and turned back to his father. "No dad, it was my fault too, it was bad timing with the Kira case... I guess, I just needed someone to talk to..." He trailed off, feeling tears building behind his eyes again, even though L was right there. No-! He shook his head. He'd done that though, hadn't he? He'd killed the one person that he'd ever-

"You really loved him, didn't you?" Soichiro asked.

Light looked away, then glanced back at L who was staring at him intently. He gave a small nod.

"Yeah... I do..."

His father grimaced sadly before he walked over and briefly hugged his son. Light stayed limp in his arms, knowing how undeserving he was of any compassion, but stared back at him with what he hoped was a reassuring smile. "I'm alright, dad. I'd just like to stay here for a while, that's all."

Soichiro nodded. "Yes, I understand son. I'll leave you alone now, I'm sorry I came around so late, but I was worried... If you want to take some time off from the case, I think that we'd all understand."

Light lowered his gaze to the floor, nodding slightly "I should be okay, but... thanks..."

His father smiled at his son, then left the room; closing the door so that it was dark once again. Light sat on the bed and averted his gaze awkwardly. When he had lost his memories of being Kira, he had told his dad that he had started having feelings for L, although at the time he thought that the detective would have never shared them back. When they had kissed just before his death it came as a shock to him that L had felt the same way, but by then it was already too late... L was going to challenge Kira, Light was going to defeat L, and Rem had been put in a position where she would protect Misa from them both, even if it cost her her own life...

_"There's no point in thinking about that now, Light-kun, we can still make things right..."_

Light started out of his thoughts to find L holding his hand and he looked up at the detective quickly. "How did you know what I was...?"

The detective smiled. _"Haven't you figure it yet, Light?"_ He leaned in closer to whisper in the teen's ear, who shivered as he felt L's surprisingly warm breath against his neck. _"I can also read your thoughts." _Light stared at him wide-eyed, then the detective laughed- a sound that he had never heard before._ "No, not really. I just thought that it would be fun to say that. By the way," _He added_ "... do you know if they've already thrown out my cake? I'm kind of craving strawberry cheesecake right now..."_

Light blinked a few times, as he processed the strange request. It seemed odd that L would just forgive him so easily for what had happened, but he supposed that he was right, there would be time to talk about things later, but for now, they had each other, and it was more than he could have ever hoped for. But still, there were a lot of things that didn't seem entirely right...

"L, how can you not hate me for what I've done... ? How can you even joke around right now?" He asked.

The detective looked back at him almost blankly, then shook his head. _"You're right, I'm sorry,"_ He paused shortly, sweeping a thumb across his lips. _"Are you tired?" _He questioned suddenly._ "Yagami-san said that you might have trouble sleeping? I can hold you if you like?"_

Light flushed and looked away. This definitely wasn't the side of L that he was used to seeing, though he gave a small nod, and lay his body down onto the bed again, carefully pulling the blankets up to his face as he felt the detectives thin arms wrap around him; his nose burying into his back. Light closed his eyes. He had only just realized how much he had been shaking before, and he tried to stop as he breathed in again the scent that was L, only this time, it was a lot more comforting.

_"Goodnight, Light-kun."_ The detective mumbled quietly, and the teen snuggled his head into the pillow, nodding, already almost feeling himself fall into sleep.

_Goodnight, L..._

* * *

_A/N. Hello C: I'm new to writing but I hope that you liked this chapter. I really would like to continue this story so any advice or feedback would be greatly appreciated, because I think that I probably make a lot of mistakes (. .') This was inspired by the anime 'Dusk Maiden of Amnesia' for anyone who has seen it, although there are a few slight changes to fit in with Death Note and the LxLight plot C: Hopefully I will see you in the next chapter, thanks for reading and please review if you like :)_


	2. Chapter 2

_A/N. Thank you to JayLawliet818, melissen, and ElykaEvelyn for your kind reviews C: I'm glad that you like the idea, and that some people followed and seemed to enjoy the story. I went back over and edited the first chapter a bit, so I hope it reads a bit better to those who maybe didn't read it before. Anyways, thank you for your patience with this chapter, I hope that you like it. If you would like to make any requests or see anything happen, then I will do my best to put it in C: Bye for now (^.^)ノ __~ DF_

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Chapter Two

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Light woke the next morning, feeling the detectives arms still wrapped around his body and he opened his eyes slowly, his body frozen and too afraid to move for a while in case the previous night had been nothing but a dream. He rolled his head carefully upwards, so that he could view L in the corner of his vision; his ebony hair fell over his face as he breathed in rhythmically, slow shallow breaths that indicated that he was still fast asleep. Odd. L never slept, at least, not so peacefully. Light shifted back around and lay there until he felt the detective roll over several minutes later, taking in a yawn. Light smiled. Just like L's laughter, it was a sound that he had never heard escape the other mans lips.

_"Light-kun?"_ L questioned still in a daze of being half asleep. Light rolled over again to face him and smiled. The happiness he felt at waking up next to the detective- and the same happiness he had felt back even when they had been chained together as possible enemies- apparent on his features. Looking at him now, he realized that some sacrifices should never be made. That by taking away L, he had taken away a light of hope that had shone brightly in the world, and to many people.

His expression must have shifted, for L was looking at him strangely now, analyzing his features so he closed his eyes before opening them again, trying to rid those previous thoughts from his mind, and placed his hand down in front of where L's head rested on the pillow.

"Morning, L," He answered. The raven haired man smiled back at him and his dark eyes weren't cold like they usually were, but gleamed with warmness as he went to swiftly kiss Light on the cheek and then sat up, stretching his arms above his head and yawning once more like he had woken from a slumber that had lasted, well, for a normal amount of hours, Light supposed, although for L it may have been the equivalent of what he normally got in a month.

The teen forced himself to sit, and swung his legs over the edge of the bed, watching as the detective walked over to the large window of the room, peering down onto the city. Light glanced at the clock. It was still only 7:02am. It would still be a while before his father and other members of the task force would arrive. He stood up to join L and they both glanced down, watching the scene below them unfold in silence as the minutes stretched on. Light's throat becoming increasingly dry as he worried that it was going to be broken by talks of Kira. After a while, it became unbearable and he shook his head resolving to bring it up.

"L, don't you want to talk about..." _Kira. You can say it._ He flinched, "_yesterday_," was the closest that he managed to get out.

L tilted his head to the side and glanced at him. _"Yesterday?"_ He questioned hesitantly, and Light's dropped his gaze to the floor. The detective stared at him with his mouth slightly open, then slowly closed it; his lips tugging upwards into another smile_._

_"In all honesty, you caught me by surprise,"_ He mused. The teen looked up at him alertly at the unexpected response, and L grinned at his reaction, reverting his gaze once again to the window and looking up at the bright sky stretching above.

His obsidian eyes traced around the patterns of clouds that he had always admired and considered to look so beautiful and surreal compared to the darkness of a four walled room, lit only by screens and power indicators. The sugar had done nothing to take away his headaches that he had often gotten, throbbing in his head and refusing to release their hold unless he of course took the occasional minutes of sleep and for a while, a few hours at best, they would leave him be. He wondered, had he ever truly been alive?

And then he realized that there was something that he had forgotten.

* * *

Light had changed and washed his face quickly before they both went to the kitchen, L still craving cake and delighted to find that it hadn't yet been thrown out. The brunette watched him as he pulled a slice out of the fridge delicately with thumb and forefinger then placed it on a plate, carrying it over to the table and perching on a chair. Light sipped a cup of black tea, his hip resting against the counter, and his gaze fixed on L as if he were too afraid to look away. And perhaps he was. He still wasn't sure how this had happened, and even considered that maybe he had simply just gone crazy but he chose to ignore those doubts and logic. It was easy enough, he supposed, when he could see and even feel that person when he was right there beside him. Although, he wasn't entirely sure if that made much sense, either. In fact, that could have just meant that he'd gone completely nuts. He frowned as L looked over, wondering what was going through the the teens mind.

_"Light-kun, is something wrong?"_ He asked quietly. Light only realized that he had been staring at him the entire time and felt his face heat up, quickly looking away.

"I was just thinking," He said, then immediately noticed how vague that must have sounded, although admitting that he was questioning L's existence was something that he couldn't bring himself to do. Light glanced back at him uncertainly. "It's just, I'm having a hard time taking this in, I guess."

L blinked as he considered Light's words, then took in the mouthful of cake, leaving the spoon to rest on his lip thoughtfully. _"What do mean?" _He questioned blandly, slightly tilting his head to the side.

Light hesitated. "Well, yesterday you..." He trailed off and shook his head, still not being able to say those words out loud, "I didn't know how to deal with it. I was angry, at myself, for not stopping what happened, but more than that, I felt like I couldn't cope with things any more. All I could feel was regret, and maybe..." _Maybe you're not really here?_ He questioned silently, feeling his heart sinking in his chest. L seemed to catch on to his train of thought and blinked.

"_The cake is real." _He said suddenly, making Light look at him questioningly. _"And I'm almost completely certain that it just can't eat itself."_ He took another bite as if to emphasize his point, _"In fact, I'm one hundred percent certain on that matter."_ Light wasn't sure whether to stare at him or laugh, but he did both before he turned around to empty the bitter tea that was in the bottom of his cup into the sink, and rinsed it out quickly, raising his head as he heard the elevator doors open in the main room and a shuffle as the first person on the task force arrived. He put the cup down quietly and strained his ears, listening as they walked towards the kitchen and making a noise that one did when they stretched. Matsuda.

"Morning guys!" He greeted, walking over to the coffee machine, putting a mug underneath before he went to flick it on, and froze. He turned back around slowly to look at the seat where L was sitting.

"Wait, that's- Ryuzaki!? But how!? We took you to the hospital, and the chief checked your pulse and everything, what, what's happening!?"

Light stared at the panicked young man wide eyed and exchanged a dumbfounded glance with the pale detective, who seemed equally as confused. At that moment, the elevator doors sounded again as someone else arrived, and a few seconds later Aizawa appeared in the kitchen, resuming to use the mug that Matsuda had put under the machine to make his coffee and wearily said; "Morning Light... morning Matsuda."

The young police officer stared at him, "Hey, what about Ryuzaki, didn't you notice that he's here too!?"

Aizawa glanced at Matsuda with an eyebrow raised, then looked around the room sceptically. "What are you talking about, is that some kind of joke?" He said, waiting impatiently for his mug to fill. Matsuda's eyes had grown to the size of dinner plates and he blinked repeatedly, opening and closing his mouth, quite unsure what to say.

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_A/N. Eep, still a little rusty but hopefully it was okay (. .') See you in the next chapter (maybe?) _じゃ！


	3. Chapter 3

_A/N. Thank you so much for all of your support in the last chapter. I was really nervous publishing it, so I was happy to see that people liked it^^ I'm... um... sorry that I'm so slow to update though (. .) And JayLawliet how you said about we all know that Light had a boy crush on L made me giggle so much! (so true!^^) A thank you goes out to MindMess for this chapter for looking over and checking it before it was published ^^ ~DF  
_

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Chapter Three

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Light closed the door of the living room before turning around to face both L and Matsuda. The young officer was still having an understandably hard time grasping the situation and he stared at L in bewilderment. This was the great detective who, until just yesterday, had led them all in solving the Kira case. Matsuda had been there at the time when the doctors had pronounced him dead- when Light had broken down in front of him; holding onto the mans cold hand, questioning why this had to happen. The teen had said that he was sorry, over and over again until Soichiro had pulled him from the room and they had all returned to head quarters solemnly, where he had refused to leave that night. Matsuda had left, as the other officers did, a little worried. Those two had seemed to be close after all, and it was obvious that a deep friendship had formed between them both. He couldn't have imagined the pain that Light was going through. It had kept him awake most of the night thinking about how awful it must have been before weariness caught up with him, and he had finally managed to fall asleep.

But now, it was like he was seeing a ghost... was L a ghost? He was sure that he never really believed in things like that, although, if someone had told him that such a thing as a note book that could kill by only writing a persons name in it existed before the Kira case, he wouldn't exactly have believed that either. He knew there were some things now that just couldn't be explained, but seeing the detective again was an obvious shock. One that he couldn't quite get his head around...

Light walked over with his arms folded, looking at them both before his gaze settled on Matsuda. He had never expected anyone else to see L, because, well, he wasn't quite sure if he was being honest, but he thought that it had something to do with his feelings for the detective, and... their feelings for each other. Somehow it had made sense. But... Matsuda? An awkward silence followed as they stood there. L could pick up on Light's uneasiness, however after a moment, the brunette sighed, slumping in his posture a little. "You can see L too, huh?" He stated more than asked and the other young man nodded hesitantly. "Y-yeah. But what's going on? How did, I mean, is it really you, Ryuzaki?"

The detective considered the young man in the corner of his vision, inclining his head slightly. _"Yes, I'm sorry to cause you such an amount o_f distress, Matsuda-san. I truly thought that no-one else would be able to see me."

"Th-then," Matsuda paled, and he felt his legs starting to weaken from underneath him. He took a step back, and sat on the lounge, his eyes wide as he processed all this. "How did you come back?"

Light felt his cheeks flush slightly as the detectives lips tugged up into a smile, shuffling closer towards the young man, and crouching to take a seat beside him. _"It's quite simple."_ He explained. _"There was something that led me to have regret in my life, and because of it I was unable to move on. Although where that was too exactly, I'm not quite sure... There was darkness, and I thought that I could feel someone holding onto my hand... and then, I could see Light-"_

The teen beside him visibly flinched as L finished saying this and Matuda's eyes had grown wider as he stared at the detective, who took his thumb away from his face and blinked at them both. _"What... did I say something odd?"_

The young officer recoiled into himself for a second before he glanced back up at L hesitantly. "When you were in the emergency ward, Light was holding your hand... do you think... it was-?"

_"Light-kun was holding my hand?"_ L repeated, looking back over to the brunette who was staring at the floor; a red blush dusting his cheeks. He hadn't wanted to let go back then. He had been afraid to. He knew that L was dead long before they had taken him to the hospital, but the detective had been lying there, on the bed as if he were just asleep; like he would wake up at any moment. His lips had been parted, his dark eyes closed. If Light had only looked upon his face, he could have pretended that there was a steady rise and fall of his chest. Why had it taken it so long for him to realize that he was truly in love with L? Why couldn't he have just brought himself to acknowledge those feelings sooner? If it hadn't been for Kira-  
- No, if it hadn't been for him...

L would still be alive.

He realized too late that there were tears rolling down his face, and he closed his eyes; feeling them burn as he tried to force them away. He wouldn't cry in front of L, not again. L deserved every slither of happiness that Light could possibly give him, in return for all the miseries that he had caused him.

When the teen had opened his eyes again, both men were staring at him and he lowered them uncomfortably before he nodded. "You looked like you might have woken up at any second, I wasn't thinking straight... I-" He trailed off, feeling uneasy confessing his feelings while Matsuda was in the room. "I'm sorry, L..." The words were whispered so gently that the detective was at a loss to reply. He stared as Light left, closing the door behind him and he felt his heart sinking in his chest.

His death had seemed to cause Light so much pain. This was entirely his fault... if only he could have remembered...

_"Matsuda-san?"_ L questioned quietly, drawing the young mans attention away from where Light had just left. "Yes, Ryuzaki?"

L let out a small sigh. _"... How did I die? I have a feeling that I remembered yesterday, but I can't seem to recall it anymore. Was it painful?"_

Matsuda hesitated before his expression softened, and he looked down to the floor as he considered it. It must have been incredibly painful, but how could somebody not remember his or her own death? "It was a heart attack." He explained quietly, "We think...we think that it was..."

* * *

_'Kira...'  
_

* * *

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

* * *

L remained by Light's side for the rest of that day, peering over his shoulders to glance at case files, but instead of feeling a curiosity about this killer known as Kira, he felt like distancing himself from it altogether. He eventually settled to crouch on a chair, peeping over the back of it so that he didn't feel so open to everybody else that was walking past who couldn't see him- sometimes accidentally walking through him. It was a sensation that he didn't find himself growing all that fond of.

He had glanced over at Light continuously noticing that he still seemed troubled. That evening, he had told his father, Soichiro, that he would be staying at head quarters for at least the next few nights, and when everyone had left, he and L were again alone. He followed Light up the stairs as he walked into the bedroom; glancing over at the wardrobe hesitantly, then pulled it open to be met with an array of white and blue. The teen frowned and pushed the hangers over, hoping that he might see something that would provide a little more warmth than a thin shirt. However, in the end he picked up two and held them out to the pale detective who regarded them blankly, picking them up with thumb and forefinger, then looked up at Light questioningly. _"What are they for exactly?"_

The brunette smiled. "I thought we could go out somewhere, and it gets pretty cold in the evening..."

_"Out?"_ L repeated, slipping them each over his head quickly. Growing up in England, he'd grown practically immune to cold climates, and he wasn't sure if he would still be able to feel it either although he dismissed these thoughts anyway, touched by the gesture. _"To where?"_

Light bit the inside of his cheek, then walked over to the bed, sitting on the edge as he looked away, blushing slightly. "Well, I thought... you never got to do anything before. So, I wanted to do this, as a..."

An apology? An acknowledgment? What was it exactly? He just wanted L to be happy...

The detective nibbled on the pad of his thumb, then walked over to stand in front of the brunette. _"Like a date?"_ He asked suddenly, causing the teen to redden even more. He waved a hand nervously. "Of course not, it's just that I wanted to take you somewhere-"

_"Like out on a date."_ L repeated quickly, his lips tugging up into a childish grin as he enjoyed watching Light twitch and feel so uneasy from it. "No-! I mean, I just..." He trailed off. He and L had both already kissed, they'd even slept in the same bed for months, but something about it seemed oddly embarrassing. Maybe, he had just never cared that much about anyone before...

He unfolded his arms, and his amber eyes slid back to look at L however they caught as he felt something soft sweep against his lips for a second before the detective pulled away, smiling at him. _"So, where are we going?"_


End file.
